If you are a parent, you may have heard of empty nest syndrome, when parents feel malaise when their child leaves the family home and spreads its wings on its own. However, have you ever heard of a child custody arrangement called the bird’s nest agreement?

Consistency is vital to a growing child. The bird’s nest custody arrangement seeks to provide stability to a child following divorce or separation and is growing in popularity as a solution to child custody situations.

Cedar Rapids, Iowa Child Custody Arrangements

Iowa law recognizes several child custody arrangements. Although custody is often used as a blanket term, several legal distinctions exist. Legal custody grants the parent the right to make significant decisions on behalf of a child, including medical care, education, and religious upbringing.

Primary physical care, also known as physical custody, grants the parent the right to have the child live with them most of the time. Iowa courts generally recognize that a child benefits from having the love and attention of both parents, making joint legal and physical custody arrangements common.

In a joint physical care parenting situation, each parent receives reasonably equal time with the child. Often, the child is shuttled back and forth between the parents’ homes, living in one home with one parent for roughly half their time and living in the other parent’s residence for the other half of their allotted time.

What Is a Bird’s Nest Custody Arrangement?

In a typical joint physical care parenting arrangement, the child moves between homes. However, in a bird’s nest custody arrangement, that living situation gets upended. Instead of the child moving back and forth, the parents come and go from the family home. A bird’s nest custody arrangement means the child remains stable in the family home, and the parents take turns living there when it is their scheduled time to be with the child.

This arrangement works by designating the family home as the “nest” where the child lives full-time. Parents each retain their individual living space outside the home and alternate who lives in the “nest” with the child according to a pre-arranged agreement or schedule. While common in joint physical care parenting plans, this agreement can also work for parents with visitation.

Benefits of Bird’s Nest Custody Arrangements

One of the most significant benefits of a bird’s nest custody arrangement in Cedar Rapids is that it gives a child a sense of stability. It can be overwhelming for a child to constantly move back and forth between environments, remember to pack their favorite toys and clothes every time, and meet new friends in a new neighborhood or school.

Bird’s Nest custody arrangements offer stability and consistency, giving children a familiar environment while they work through their complicated feelings on divorce and their new family dynamics.

Other benefits to a bird’s nest custody situation:

  • Minimize disruptions to a child’s life
  • Let the child remain in the same school and community
  • Gives them a familiar place to stay
  • Let parents focus on communication and effective co-parenting
  • It may help ease the transition of divorce for the child
  • Potential for fewer behavioral issues

Difficulties with Bird’s Nest Custody

However, while beneficial in several regards, a bird’s nest arrangement is not ideal for every family and can cause significant financial strain if parents attempt to cover the cost of the family home and two new residences. The cost of maintaining multiple households, in addition to daily expenses and potentially child or spousal support, can be a drain. Other issues can include:

  • Emotional issues and instability for parents
  • Potential for conflict between parents when sharing the family home
  • Scheduling issues
  • Communication challenges

A bird’s nest custody solution requires careful legal and emotional considerations to work for Cedar Rapids families. Parents must be willing to work collaboratively together and in the best interests of their child for this type of custody arrangement to work. It may also take detailed financial planning and budgeting.

A Cedar Rapids, Iowa, Family Law Attorney Can Help You Evaluate Your Custody Options

As a parent, you want to do what’s best for your child. However, in the middle of a divorce or child custody case, it can be challenging to move past the complicated emotions you may feel during this time. A compassionate Cedar Rapids family law attorney with Arenson Law Group, PC can help you objectively evaluate your options and find personalized legal solutions that address your needs and concerns.

Call our office today at (319) 220-6700 or contact us online to learn more about bird’s nest custody and whether maintaining separate homes is the right option for your family.

Written by James H. Arenson

Last Updated : February 21, 2025